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As part of my regular blogging, I’ll be sharing some of the amazing resources I use to inspire me. It wouldn’t be right to coach people and help people to lead or form teams without keeping myself up to date with the very latest thinking. I’m therefore always reading and I’d love to share a book review with you every now and again.
Today’s blog is not about a new book, but rather one which underpins a lot of what I do. It’s all about what it takes for people to rise up from significant challenge and go on to be a stronger version of themselves.
Several years ago, I was lucky enough to see Brené Brown speak live. It was in London and it was an experience that will stay with me forever. For those of you not familiar with her work, she’s a Research Professor at the University of Houston who has studied courage, vulnerability, shame and empathy. She’s written five bestselling books and, in her words, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.”
The key themes
Rising Strong deals with the power of emotion and what it takes to lean in to discomfort.
Brené feels that, if we are brave enough, often enough, we will inevitably fall. But it’s what we do after we fall that really defines who we are and shapes our future.
Brené’s expertise in vulnerability and speaking the truth also feature strongly.
The key learnings
Reading this book gave me a way of getting to know my own truth, which is probably why it is one that I still refer to frequently, despite it being published five years ago. My personal struggle started when it became clear that working and living the corporate life was no longer for me. The culmination of this struggle – and, with hindsight, the start of my truth – was picking up this book, in floods of tears, and reading it almost from cover to cover immediately.
Brené outlines three stages of the Rising Strong process: the Reckoning, the Rumble, and the Revolution. These stages are all about how we deal with falling. If we recognise our feelings (the Reckoning), and we are curious then we will rise strong. This means we are walking into our story and we can then eventually be true to ourselves and comfortable with that.
The Rumble is our truth sayer. It’s when we demystify whatever we’ve made up to fill gaps in our stories. This is when we define ourselves rather than accepting the box we might have been put in.
The Revolution is about how we write the ending to our own story. How do we want it to look? This is when we can reach an honest view of where we are and what we want for ourselves.
More Brené
If the sound of this book intrigues you, if you’ve ever fallen (and whether you got back up strongly or not), or if you’ve ever wondered whether you are living your true life then this book is for you. But so is Brené and I wanted to share some other inspirational moments where she has provided a banquet of food for thought.
Her TED Talk on vulnerability is, in my opinion, one of the best and well worth a listen.
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Her latest podcast series, Unlocking Us, consists of some really inspirational conversations with people on simply being human – and how we live, love, parent and lead. These are a good accompaniment to a free hour or so when you can take some time out and listen with a cuppa.
I’ll leave you with one of my favourite Brené Brown quotes about leadership:
“A brave leader is someone who says I see you. I hear you. I don’t have all the answers, but I’m going to keep listening and asking questions.”
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